I Miss Being a Mall Santa
Dear Rémy,
Prior to my career as a television personality, I would spend my time working as a mall Santa in Seattle during the holiday season. There’s something genuinely enchanting about slipping into that red suit each December, adding a false belly and nestling myself into a sparkling grotto while children with rosy cheeks rush past.
Despite its simplicity, it brought me a profound sense of meaning. I would listen to children’s heartfelt Christmas wishes, share in the joy as parents chuckled at their toddlers’ amusing remarks, and feel that my efforts were significant. As a bonus, I was allowed to take home the Santa costume once the season ended.
These days, my life has undergone a significant transformation. Nearly every evening, you can find me on television, ranging from dramas to comedies. The pay is astronomical compared to what Santa earned, approximately 2000 times more per day, but lately, it seems unfulfilling. The roles I take on are devoid of soul, and I can’t help but feel like I’m squandering my time. If given the chance, I’d return to being Santa in an instant; however, I understand that I would be identified, and I couldn’t jeopardize the enchantment for the children in that manner.
Am I chasing the wrong kind of success? How do I find meaning again?
Yours,
Searching for Saint Nick
Dear Searching for Saint Nick,
Instead of feeling a longing for Santa himself, what you truly yearn for is the significance he brought into your life. During that time, it wasn’t the salary or status that mattered; it was all about fostering relationships, experiencing happiness, and engaging in activities that held a deep sense of purpose.
But let me ask: what would happen if you reframed success? What if you stopped chasing roles that leave you cold and used the freedom your career has given you to create something truly meaningful? Maybe it’s a project where you play someone who embodies the same spirit as Santa, or perhaps it’s stepping away from acting altogether to find new ways to connect with others.
Additionally, you have the option to engage with your community during the holiday season in a fun and festive way. Could you perhaps create a unique character that combines elements of your true identity with something whimsical and enchanting? Maybe an elf, reindeer, or even a humorous twist on the Grinch version of yourself?
In this scenario, I’d rephrase as follows: “Imagine the happiest version of yourself. What activities does this person engage in? Now, it’s your moment to reshape your journey—not driven by recognition or wealth, but fueled by pure joy.
Yours,
Rémy
Help! My Ex is Making a Movie About Me!
Dear Rémy,
Next year, my ex-girlfriend is releasing a biopic, and it’s driving me nuts.
We didn’t part on the best terms, and although years have passed, I can’t stop worrying about what she might reveal to the world. Will she share details of the fight where I ugly-cried into a vat of Apple Pie Ben & Jerry’s? Or the fact that I couldn’t fall asleep between 2006 and 2008 unless I snuggled with a pillow effigy of myself? I’m not proud of how I treated her: I spoke down to her at music industry parties, was unreliable and only let her drive the smallest of my Porsches.
Currently, I find myself in a challenging situation. Not only am I now married, but the prospect of past mistakes being highlighted in this upcoming film leaves me uncomfortable. I’ve spent countless hours wandering through my Laurel Canyon mansion, gazing at the walls adorned with framed gold records, contemplating a response. Should I engage a PR team to stay one step ahead? Seek refuge on my private island in the Dutch Antilles? Or perhaps, and this might seem drastic, produce my own biopic? Though it didn’t end so favorably for Jennifer Lopez, the idea still crosses my mind.
What do you think, Rémy? I’m truly stumped.
Yours,
Unprotected Ex
Dear Unprotected Ex,
It seems like you’re preparing a complex defense, perhaps against someone who may not pose a threat at all. Might it be possible that the actual issue is not the biography of your ex, but rather unresolved feelings of guilt about how things concluded between you two?
Hey there, it seems we’ve both acknowledged that I wasn’t flawless in our relationship. However, I can’t help but wonder: Are you prepared to let me share my side of the story, or are you more concerned about maintaining the polished image you’ve been projecting since we parted ways? Instead of planning a defensive move (which might give off some Emperor Palpatine vibes), could you embrace the peculiarities and imperfections that make each of us unique humans? Remember the ice cream obsession, the pillow effigy, even the Porsche thing – what if these little quirks were the very things that drew people to me?
Perhaps a better course of action isn’t to craft a public relations strategy but to create a song – one that embraces your flaws and rewrites the story in a way that only you can express. Essentially, strive to embody wisdom and humility like Yoda, rather than manipulation and deceit like Palpatine.
Yours,
Rémy
My Career as a Movie Caterer Is Killing Me!
Dear Rémy,
Initially, food and nurturing others were passions of mine, yet catering wasn’t my initial aspiration. Instead, in my twenties, I yearned to be a producer. For some years, I even worked as a production assistant in L.A., but it didn’t take long for me to understand that the control and precision I desired would remain elusive in such a hectic profession.
The experience of catering was distinct. I had the ability to craft something tangible, exquisite even, that brought joy to people. For quite some time, this endeavor thrived. I embarked on starting my own catering business and supplied casts and teams on numerous high-profile Hollywood sets. Witnessing an actor’s smile upon tasting one of my homemade apricot madeleines once felt like a modest effort to improve the entertainment industry.
Lately, things have gotten overwhelming at work. Coworkers constantly ask me about where our ingredients come from, if our fruit salad is gluten-free, or if my menu adheres to an alkaline diet (and I respond with “Costco,” “Fruit doesn’t contain gluten” and “I’m not sure what that means”). Directors criticize me when the quinoa isn’t cooked to their liking, while some team members demand vegan meals and others ridicule them for it. It seems like I can’t please everyone, and the joy I once took in making people happy has faded away.
Rémy, should I adapt, or is it time to move on?
Yours,
Hating on Catering
Dear Hating on Catering,
You’ve constructed an extraordinary career by making something substantial in an industry that flourishes on disorder. That’s practically a miracle, and it’s unfortunate there isn’t more recognition for those of you who maintain the industry’s smooth operation from behind the scenes – maybe even a ‘Gastronomical Grammys’ could be established.
It seems that the pleasure you once derived from achieving perfection is being clouded now, perhaps because the expectations of others seem impossible to fulfill.
Let me ask: Was it really about perfection, or was it about the happiness you brought to others? And is it possible to find that again — maybe not in movie catering but in a way that lets you reconnect with what you love about food? Whether it’s opening your dream restaurant, writing a cookbook or setting new boundaries for your business, it’s time to reclaim your vision.
Your dream might have evolved, but it’s still yours. Are you ready to follow it?
Yours,
Rémy
Remy Blumenfeld, an experienced television producer and the creator of Vitality Guru, provides guidance for professionals excelling in media through business and career coaching. You can reach out with your questions to: guru@vitality.guru.
Questions edited by Sarah Mills.
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2024-12-21 21:25