In a tale of confusion, irony, and no small dose of chutzpah, the parents of the beleaguered FTX founder, Sam Bankman-Fried, have thrown themselves into the labyrinthine corridors of legal pardons. They are, as the saying goes, trying to get a get-out-of-jail-free card from none other than President Donald âThe Pardonerâ Trump. đ
Sam Bankman-Fried, for those who havenât been keeping up with the drama of modern finance, is currently enjoying a 25-year state-sponsored vacation, courtesy of a fraud conviction that shook the crypto world more than a teenagerâs failed attempt at making soufflĂ©. Ah, those were the days.
The âPardon Meâ Campaign (No, Seriously)
Our protagonists, the Stanford Law School professors Joseph Bankman and Barbara Fried, are reportedly diving headfirst into deep discussions with anyone who might lend an ear â lawyers, political insiders, and probably the bloke who sells hotdogs outside the courthouse â all in an effort to persuade Trumpâs merry band to sprinkle some presidential magic and do a bit of sentence vanishing.
âJUST IN: Sam Bankman-Friedâs parents explore seeking a pardon from President Trump for their son, Bloomberg reports.â đ
The plot thickens as Bankman-Friedâs ever-determined legal team have already appealed against his 2023 conviction. FTXâs implosion remains a high point (or low point, depending on your perspective) in cryptocurrencyâs turbulent saga. With accusations of pilfering customer assets and fooling FTXâs creditors and investors, our man Sam ended up causing an $8 billion black hole. đ
Trump: The Wizard of Pardons
Donald Trump, ever the magnanimous dispenser of judicial absolution, is no stranger to pardoning noteworthy crypto characters. Perhaps the most infamous of his lucky recipients was Ross Ulbricht of Silk Road infamy. Yet, as white-collar criminals across the land line up for a sprinkle of Trumpâs forgiving fairy dust, Bankman-Friedâs chances areâhow do we put itâbleak at best. After all, Samâs saga hasnât exactly spurred a chorus of public sympathy, especially with his insistence on an Oliver Twist-style âPlease sir, I didnât do it.â đ§
Legal advisor Jeffrey Grant articulates the groundswell of hope and ambition among the convicted and soon-to-be-convicted:
âWe have been hearing from people in prison, from people recently sentenced who havenât yet reported to the Bureau of Prisons, from people who have just been indicted. They are looking for somebody who knows somebody.â đ”ïžââïž
Not to be outdone, another FTX alumnus, Ryan Salame, is eyeing his own golden ticket out of the slammer, though heâs only seven years into his sentence. Meanwhile, the clemency express remains busy, as Sam Mangel, master prison consultant for the notorious, has been juggling pardon pleas like a circus clown with too few hands. đȘ
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2025-01-31 18:16