🎩 Posh Investment Firm Throws Millions at Crypto Chaps in Most British Way Possible

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I say, what-ho! The most extraordinary news has landed on my desk like one of Aunt Agatha’s disapproving letters. Franklin Templeton, that frightfully serious investment outfit, has gone and done something rather sporty by leading an $8 million seed round into a thingummy called Cap. Rather like Jeeves solving the mystery of my missing sock garters, they’ve been joined by a jolly crew of co-conspirators including Susquehanna and Triton Capital (sound like characters from one of Boko’s theatrical ventures, what?) 🧐

A Previous Flutter with the Betting Public 💫

As it happens, this latest splash of cash follows a rather modest $1.1 million community round, which reminds me of the time Tuppy Glossop tried to raise funds for his soup-less restaurant idea. The round was conducted on something called Echo, masterminded by a chap named Jordan “Cobie” Fish (sounds like one of Gussie Finknottle’s peculiar acquaintances, if you ask me). The “MegaETH Mafia” – rather reminiscent of the Drones Club, though presumably with fewer bread rolls being thrown – have also pitched in. 🎭

Technical Mumbo-Jumbo That Would Befuddle Bertie 🤔

Now, here’s where it gets rather like one of Jeeves’s explanations about quantum physics. Cap is apparently dabbling with something called EigenLayer’s “shared security marketplace” – which, I gather, is not unlike sharing one’s last bottle of Bollinger with the entire membership of the Junior Ganymede. The whole affair settles on something called Ethereum, though I’m told it’s primarily focused on MegaETH, which sounds like a particularly large Welsh town. 🎩

The Money-Making Bits 💰

Rather like Uncle Tom’s scheme to make money from his collection of silver cow-creamers, Cap generates yield through something called the “restaking market.” Users deposit their USDC or USDT (presumably not related to TNT, thank heavens) to mint something called cUSD. The whole thing’s more complicated than one of Aunt Dahlia’s dinner party seating arrangements. 🎪

The Final Word on Borrowing and Such 📜

It appears that distinguished institutions like Franklin Templeton can borrow these digital thingamabobs, much like how I frequently borrow five pounds from Bingo Little (though with considerably more paperwork, I should imagine). Cap takes a modest 10% fee, rather like Jeeves’s commission for getting me out of unwanted engagements. And there’s something called “loan insurance” involved – presumably in case the whole thing goes as wrong as one of my attempts to play the banjolele. 🎭

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2025-04-07 23:37