US DOJ Disbands Crypto Crackdown Unit Amid Trump’s Pro-Crypto Overhaul

Shocking Crypto Twist: DOJ Abandons Biden’s Dream—Trump Cheers! 😜

In the long, bitter chronicle of our bureaucratic winter, the American Department of Justice has, with the grim humor of fate, silenced its National Cryptocurrency Enforcement Team. As if casting away an old relic lost in time, this act marks yet another absurd chapter in the saga of government oversight. 😏

Thus unfolds another ironic twist: under the spectral influence of Trump’s pro-crypto overtures, the nation’s regulators now seem to prefer leniency over relentless persecution—a retreat reminiscent of a weary soldier abandoning his post in a snowstorm of contradictions.

US DOJ Disbands Crypto Unit

On a cold Monday evening, a four-page memo—steeped in the bitter irony of political expediency—bore the pronouncement of this drastic measure. Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche, a man whose allegiance to the old guard rivals that of a defiant relic of past regimes, declared the decision with an unmistakable hint of dark amusement.

Fortune, ever the chronicler of the absurd, recounted that the DOJ would henceforth no longer masquerade as an omnipotent regulator of digital affairs. With a sardonic flourish, the department would immediately cease its sweeping, indiscriminate crusade against crypto platforms and protocols—almost as if it were tired of its own relentless folly. 😂

This edict, cold and unforgiving as a Siberian dusk, signals a turning point in the state’s approach to digital assets. The era of high-profile witch hunts gives way to a methodical focus on individual malefactors—a transformation as profound as it is ironic.

“The Department of Justice is not a digital assets regulator. The prior Administration used the Justice Department to pursue a reckless strategy of regulation by prosecution,” the memo intoned, echoing like a bitter refrain in the corridors of power.

Thus, the forlorn NCET, born under the hopeful auspices of a bygone administration in 2021, now vanishes into the abyss—its legacy a blend of triumphs and tragedies: from the prosecution of Tornado Cash developers to the high-stakes takedown of figures like Avraham Eisenberg amid financial intrigues that could shame even the most outlandish spy novel.

Deputy Blanche’s decree makes it abundantly clear: the DOJ shall now direct its wrath solely at those individual perfidious souls who betray their fellows in the unforgiving world of crypto, rather than smite the very infrastructure that supports digital ambition. One might almost smile at the sheer audacity of it all—if not for the weight of historic irony. 😉

In forsaking cases involving privacy-centric protocols and decentralized systems, the agency sidesteps controversies where critics once decried open-source innovation as criminal folly—a notion as ludicrous as trying to legislate the winds.

From Crackdown to Regulatory Clarity

Once, NCET had stood as a formidable emblem of governmental resolve—a mythical force collaborating across borders to dismantle exchanges like Garantex and to confiscate vast fortunes from Silk Road-related wallets. Yet, its broad, sweeping hand often blurred the sacred line between safeguarding society and smothering progress.

Critics, with the cynical detachment of those who have witnessed too many betrayals, argued that halting open-source innovation on the mere pretext of a few bad actors was an overreach of power akin to the absurdities of totalitarian dogma.

“…blocking open source technology entirely because a small portion of users are bad actors is not what Congress authorized. These sanctions stretched Treasury’s authority beyond recognition, and the Fifth Circuit agreed,” lamented Paul Grewal, Coinbase’s Chief Legal Officer, his words dripping with the irony of modern governance.

Now, in a move that might well have made even the most cynical smile in disbelief, Trump’s DOJ appears to embrace his vision. By dismantling the task force, federal priorities pivot toward punishing the unmistakable acts of fraud—like phony Ponzi schemes and desperate phishing attacks—instead of alienating the very heartbeat of crypto innovation.

This shift mirrors Trump’s relentless campaign to enshrine digital assets as pillars of national strategy. In an almost theatrical gesture back in March, he directed federal agencies to ease their grip—transforming oversight into a framework that could be both clear and, ironically, liberating.

Proposals even whispered of a national Bitcoin reserve, a notion as fantastical as it is emblematic of the era’s grand ambitions and darker ironies.

Indeed, as the memo unfolds like a bitter fable, the DOJ’s retrenchment is echoed in the actions of civil regulators. The CFTC, for one, has stepped back from its aggressive stance, thereby allowing the crypto derivatives market to dance on the edge of legality with a wink and a smile.

Yet, to be clear, this retreat does not signal the end of all enforcement. The theater of justice will continue its grim performance against the true malefactors—those whose dark deeds touch on terrorism financing and individual fraud, leaving behind remnants of seized funds and shattered criminal enterprises.

2025-04-08 15:58

US DOJ Disbands Crypto Unit

From Crackdown to Regulatory Clarity

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