Meta Sabotages Bitcoin Dream – The Unexpected Drama

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Meta Sabotages Bitcoin Dream – The Unexpected Drama

Imagine this: Meta Platforms’ shareholders sitting in a room, probably debating whether Bitcoin should be the new mascot of their giant cash piggy bank. Turns out, they said a big, fat no. Nearly 9 million votes abstained, which I assume is code for “We’re just here for the free snacks,” and about 205 million shares decided to stay silent, probably sleeping through the meeting. The vote happened this week at what I assume was a fancy meeting with less cake and more serious frowns. The proposal? To turn part of Meta’s $72 billion stash into Bitcoin. Spoiler alert: They said no. 🥱

Shareholders Reject Bitcoin Proposal

Enter Ethan Peck, a guy wearing glasses and probably a pocket calculator, from the National Center for Public Policy Research. He suggested Meta consider turning some of that mountain of cash into Bitcoin, hoping to dodge inflation and the low returns from bonds. Because who doesn’t want their company’s savings to be as volatile as a toddler on sugar? Peck claimed Bitcoin’s fixed supply and past price jumps might be the superhero cape for Meta’s shrinking piggy bank. The shareholders? Mostly deaf to the idea, sticking with the board’s sage advice: “Stay safe, keep the cash, avoid the madness.”

Meta Platforms Shareholders Vote Against Bitcoin Treasury Assessment Proposal

— Phoenix » PhoenixNews.io (@PhoenixNewsIO) May 30, 2025

Board Cites Solid Treasury Management

Meta’s board, that group of wise old owls, said, “Nah, we got this.” They confidently declared that they don’t need “another thing” to worry about—like Bitcoin. They already have a shiny plan to keep the company’s money safe. They claim they’re experts at juggling investments and they’re pretty confident their current method keeps the money flowing faster than a toddler’s tantrum. As for Bitcoin? No comment. Probably because they don’t want to admit they might be missing out on a rollercoaster of fun.

Push For Corporate Bitcoin Falls Short

Apparently, Microsoft and Amazon also tried to jump on the crypto bandwagon, but they got off just as quickly. Microsoft’s shareholders, in December 2024, politely told them Bitcoin was not welcome on the balance sheet. Amazon? Ignored. Despite Mark Zuckerberg naming his goats “Bitcoin” and “Max”—because goats are the new crypto mascots—and Marc Andreessen moonlighting on Coinbase’s board, big tech remains cautious. Mainly, they’re worried about crazy price swings and the extra headache of crypto regulations, probably afraid of turning into the next crypto cautionary tale.

Meta Shifts Focus To Stablecoin

Instead of risking the company’s piggy bank in the wild wild west of Bitcoin, Meta is keen on playing it safe with stablecoins. Rumor has it they’re cozying up with crypto infrastructure partners to use a stablecoin for global payouts. It’s like swapping rollercoasters for a nice, predictable Ferris wheel—less nausea, more stability. This appears to be Meta’s way of saying, “We’re back in the crypto game, but instead of a rollercoaster, give us a merry-go-round.” Remember Diem? That project is dead. Meta’s new plan suggests a more mature approach—like going from wild Fridays to quiet weekends—focusing on speedy, cheap payments rather than wild crypto rides. 💸🚀

For now, Bitcoin will remain a rumor at Meta’s fancy meetings. Some companies, like Tesla, have already thrown their hats into the Bitcoin ring, but Meta’s board prefers a well-behaved piggy bank—aka stablecoins. It’s about speed and stability, not the rollercoaster every crypto enthusiast dreams of. Because who needs excitement when you can have predictability, right? Or at least that’s what they tell themselves as they sip their coffee and avoid the crypto chaos.

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2025-06-01 12:13