Matthew Perry’s Inner Circle on Turning Tragedy Into Purpose by Helping Addicts: “Still Working With Him”

Matthew Perry’s Inner Circle on Turning Tragedy Into Purpose by Helping Addicts: “Still Working With Him”

As someone who has been fortunate enough to work with numerous celebrities throughout my career, I can confidently say that the story of Matthew Perry and his resilience is truly exceptional. His struggle with addiction was not just a personal battle but a global one, a fight that touched millions of lives around the world.


For many years, Doug Chapin, Matthew Perry’s manager, and Lisa Kasteler, his publicist, had never before conducted a joint interview about their esteemed client. This was true even during the peak of his professional achievements when he rose through the Hollywood ranks to become a beloved comedy icon for portraying Chandler Bing on the globally successful series Friends. Additionally, this was also the case during periods when Perry faced personal struggles, such as his private battles with substance abuse.

Instead, Chapin and Kasteler created a safe environment for their high-profile client, who chose to break free from the embarrassment and social repercussions of addiction by penning his personal account in the 2022 memoir titled Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing, which reached the top of the New York Times bestseller list. In this book, the actor expressed that rather than fame or being associated with Friends, he aspired for his lasting impact to be in assisting other substance abusers and alcoholics on their journey towards sobriety.

Due to his powerful words and dedication to service, Chapin and Kasteler felt compelled to speak up immediately. Following the unfortunate death of Perry at just 54 years old due to ketamine overdose, they swiftly established the Matthew Perry Foundation within a few days, ensuring that his mission continued on.

Both Chapin and Kasteler charted new paths with the foundation by retiring from their previous gigs — Chapin as a manager-producer and Kasteler as founding partner of the A-list publicity firm Wolf-Kasteler — but they remain as close as ever with other members of Perry’s team of trusted confidantes. To mark the organization’s one year anniversary, Chapin and Kasteler gathered for a Zoom interview with The Hollywood Reporter to discuss the “emotional” work, what they’ve learned over the past year and how they managed to turn tragedy into purpose.

As Chapin puts it, “The legacy he left us is that we’re all still connected. Although he’s gone, the friendship we forged over these decades as a team, it endures.” Kasteler adds, “When people ask me how long I’ve been working with him, I tell them it feels like I’m still doing so today.” (Gamer perspective: As Chapin explains, “The gift he left us was that we’re all still gaming together. Even though he’s moved on, the camaraderie we built over these years of being a team, it lives on.”)

It’s quite unusual for both of you to participate in an interview as a team, and this underlines the effectiveness of your foundation. How does it feel for you to be part of this interview? Is it indeed the first time something like this has happened?

KASTELER You’re correct. Annette and I weren’t the type of publicists who sought self-promotion. We often saw other publicists mentioned in articles, but we were taught that it’s not about us, it’s about our clients. However, if I were to explain why I’m speaking now, it’s because of the deep-seated passion we both have for what we do.

CHAPIN We both have a long-standing practice of letting our clients voice their own opinions. We don’t typically offer public views ourselves. However, the foundation is our final project for Matthew, and if he were still with us, he would undoubtedly be discussing this with you. Unfortunately, he isn’t here, leaving us to step in and explain, “This is what we are working on and this is how we are achieving it.” Essentially, we’re just filling a role that he would have filled himself in his absence.

You said “last assignment.” Is that how you view the work for Matthew?

CHAPIN His final statement, found in the book but also shared with us personally, was his desire to be remembered primarily for his acts of kindness rather than his role as Chandler on Friends or for his celebrity status. Following his passing, we decided to carry on this mission. In fact, Lisa had already initiated discussions about establishing a foundation, making it a natural and crucial step towards realizing his wish.

SPEAKER I had a conversation with him approximately three days before his demise, as I was phoning to inform him about my retirement but assure him we’d still collaborate. I was eager for us to carry on working together on the foundation and other matters we had previously discussed. Matthew typically communicated via text messages, so I reached out to arrange a visit. I wanted to see him in person within a few days. He agreed, but asked me to clarify the reason immediately. He couldn’t wait. We switched to a phone call, and I shared my intention to step down from [Wolf-Kasteler]. A few minutes into the chat, he inquired, “Doesn’t this simply mean you’ll have more time for me?” We ended the call and twenty seconds later, he phoned again, repeating his question. He seemed to be looking forward to having more of my time. Unfortunately, misfortune struck soon after our conversation.

Prior to this point, we had been traveling together for the book, and Matthew was conducting extensive Q&A sessions across various cities. It was during this time that he truly grasped the effect he had on individuals who recognized him as Matthew, not Chandler. The response was overwhelmingly positive. This realization sparked the notion that he was sufficient. A theme he often explored in his book, as he never felt adequate himself, but he was more than enough and could assist people because he was so well-loved. This is essentially where it all began for him, and he discovered this was a path he wanted to pursue. It’s no secret that Matthew had always been doing these acts of kindness in our town. We recently heard another tale about someone who resided at his house intermittently for an entire year. He had also been a silent supporter of those battling the disease.

As a devoted fan, I can’t help but express how profoundly impactful the book and its related tour stops have been in shaping his journey with this work. For nearly three years prior to publication, he’d been wrestling with his words, starting and pausing at different times, and sending me lengthy drafts of a single chapter. The question that constantly crossed his mind was whether he was ready to reveal this intimate part of himself, if it served a purpose.

Matthew Perry’s Inner Circle on Turning Tragedy Into Purpose by Helping Addicts: “Still Working With Him”

How do you define the mission?

One significant aim we’ve been given is to combat the stigma surrounding certain issues, particularly addiction. This misconception often prevents people from seeking help and hinders those around them who don’t understand what’s happening or how they can assist. This goal serves as a foundation for all our efforts. We aim to strengthen individuals and organizations to bridge gaps in the recovery process, which commences when someone bravely asks for help. The main obstacle to this initial step is stigma.

As an ardent supporter, I can’t help but reflect on a heartbreaking statistic: Over 48 million individuals in this nation grapple with a disease, yet merely one-fifth of them opt for treatment. The reasons behind their reluctance are complex and deeply personal, aspects Matthew has eloquently addressed and discussed. Had he not felt the stigma and chosen to conceal his condition – no doubt due to professional constraints – I am convinced that he would be here with us today. If our foundation can make even the tiniest impact in dispelling this ignorance surrounding the disease, that achievement, in my view, would define success. To me, a truly successful endeavor would be one that transforms our society’s understanding of this condition.

He unfortunately passed away on October 28, and the foundation was officially announced on November 3. This quick succession of events might have seemed sudden to many, but now it’s clear that you had been deliberating this for quite some time. Could you tell us more about those discussions and how you were able to move forward so swiftly even during such a difficult period, given the timing of the foundation’s launch?

During a challenging period, some significant decisions were on the horizon. Discussions about establishing a foundation had been brewing even before then. I remember taking him aside during the summer, sharing my vision of how it could take shape.

PARAPHRASE Lisa discussed several tools that accelerated our progress once we began, however, it’s important to consider the broader context, such as the book and its influence on him and the public. This triggered numerous discussions about sustaining this impact. We considered producing a documentary. He was brainstorming an idea for a talk show aimed at addicts, by addicts. Collaborating with exceptional producers, we were investigating methods to adapt the book into a project like a mini-series. The foundation was involved in this broader discussion of how we could build upon this beneficial moment for people.

When the book launched, it sparked countless tales about how it transformed people’s lives. Many readers found healing within its pages, or reached out to loved ones needing help. These heartwarming stories circulated widely, igniting a collective yearning to carry this positive momentum forward. With other activities temporarily on pause, this was the one journey we decided to pursue to satisfy that craving.

KASTELER In the past, I’ve experienced other losses, and finding solace in returning to work has been incredibly beneficial for me. It somehow gave me the sense that he was still around.

CHAPIN You’re talking to two people who woke up every day…

KASTELER Crying…

Mourning Indeed, we cried when he passed away. For years, we’ve often pondered, “What are we honoring him with today?” Upon his demise, it felt instinctive to wonder, “How can we pay tribute to him now?

KASTELER When people ask me how long I worked with him, I say that I’m still working with him.

Matthew Perry’s Inner Circle on Turning Tragedy Into Purpose by Helping Addicts: “Still Working With Him”

Hey Doug, is there a possibility for any of the projects you talked about, such as a documentary or miniseries, to be adapted as a memorial or tribute to him in some way instead?

Initially, the family has no interest in pursuing documentaries, and Matthew’s involvement in such discussions merely served as an exploration of possibilities that didn’t align with his preferences. Consistently, we have declined documentary offers, and any potential adaptation of the book shares the same sentiment. The general consensus among family and associates is that he told his own story through the book, so it’s best to let him have the final say. This makes documentaries less appealing due to their reliance on his presence. Expanding literature often requires making subjective judgments, such as how to represent a moment accurately or convert sections into dialogue. The book would require Matthew’s co-authorship, with his older self conversing with his younger self within the narrative. Following his passing, our decision remained unchanged – we felt it was essential to let him tell his story in his own words.

Could you tell me how you determined the area of emphasis for your foundation’s resources and chose the organizations you decided to aid?

KASTELER The mission wasn’t hard to find since we had the guidebook which provided us with a solid base. Addiction is a widespread issue and we felt compelled to assist where help might not be readily available otherwise. This led to the creation of grassroots recovery grants due to California potentially facing a $78 billion deficit, putting various organizations at risk. After conducting thorough research, we aimed for a diverse range of grantees, which we successfully found. Some of these organizations have an annual budget of only $50,000 and were astonished when we offered them substantial sums of money. For two consecutive days, I called numerous people to say, “Hello, here’s some funding for you.

Additionally, our experience in philanthropy has shown that providing unrestricted funds is exceptionally rare. The tasks these organizations must undertake and the hurdles they are compelled to clear just to secure or maintain a grant can be daunting. In fact, some of them were skeptical when we contacted from the Matthew Perry Foundation; they thought it was a scam. It’s likely they didn’t fully believe it until the check was in their hands.

CHAPIN Initially, we focused on smaller, underfunded organizations that might struggle to secure government funding. Many of these organizations lack the resources to handle grant applications and comply with the necessary procedures. We saw an opportunity to address this gap as it aligned perfectly with Matthew’s philosophy of making a tangible difference. Instead of working with large, theoretical organizations, we preferred to offer help directly to people in need on the street.

I, as one who values more than just personal recognition, wasn’t seeking the type of philanthropy where my name is etched on a wall. I don’t require that. What truly resonates with me is the opportunity to extend a helping hand and instill hope in others.

How was it to sit in a room for those two days making the calls?

In simpler terms, have I ever performed anything similar to that before? It was truly remarkable. The audience wept. They referred to it as a divine play. Frankly, they simply couldn’t comprehend it. They were taken aback by its grandeur. It was indeed extraordinary.

CHAPIN (Paraphrased) We dispatched some team members to visit different organizations, as part of our strategy to foster a collaborative community where these groups can learn from each other by exchanging successful strategies. Our aim was to establish a diverse group that could pool their knowledge based on their varied experiences in assisting people. This way, they could amass valuable information for themselves and us, enabling us to continually gather the most effective methods when we extend our efforts to other states and continue our work of supporting people during recovery.

KASTELER I deeply respect Melinda Gates, and in her latest article for Vanity Fair, she discussed her new approach to philanthropy as she operates independently. Instead of entering an organization with a predetermined solution, she adopts a method by engaging in dialogue with people who are directly experiencing the issues and dealing with them daily. This approach aligns with our core values; we aim to involve individuals, listen to their experiences, and find ways to make a meaningful impact.

CHAPIN During our investigation, we collaborated with local leaders from various communities across California to ensure comprehensive coverage. These community leaders suggested organizations they deemed effective within their respective areas. Consequently, we amassed a substantial list, which we subsequently narrowed down to individuals who displayed unique approaches and demonstrated diversity – considering factors such as race, geographical location, and recovery methodologies.

In a remote area of California, there’s an organization playing multiple roles as a community center. They’ve become deeply integrated within the community through their provision of social services and involvement with local law enforcement. They operate a food bank to assist those in need. When individuals were required or willing to seek recovery, they had a well-established system ready. Some places, like Los Angeles, don’t struggle as much with this issue but have found alternative ways to fulfill their mission.

In Mariposa Heritage House, a town near Yosemite, there’s a baseball team called the Sober Sluggers, composed of individuals who have undergone recovery. They’ve faced off against parole officers from law enforcement. We are designing uniforms for this team. The people at the organization appreciate our support, as the team helps foster community and provides an opportunity for fair competition, which can be empowering for their recovery journey.>

Did you and Doug mutually decide not to provide restricted grants and abstain from any recognition such as pats on the back or names on doors when making this decision?

KASTELER You might find references to us on a website, but it’s not just about us; there’s an entire team here at the Matthew Perry Foundation. We feel it’s important to acknowledge someone else because we form a trio. Her name is Lisa Ferguson and she served as Matthew’s business manager for everything. In fact, she had been working with him longer than both Doug and I did. She holds the position of secretary-treasurer at the foundation.

In our process of awarding grants and contributions, we emphasize on listening and absorbing knowledge. Typically, when a recipient receives a grant, there’s a stipulation where the funds can’t be utilized immediately. First, they need to outline their intended use for the money, then they receive the grant, followed by the requirement to demonstrate that they are adhering to this plan. The process involves numerous steps and requirements, making it rather complex.

In the case of this particular food bank, they were prohibited from distributing food to homeless individuals due to lack of cooking and storage facilities. Consequently, they began preparing meals on site, allowing them to provide ready-to-eat meals to people in need. Larger organizations like this often have good intentions, but they must navigate a complex web of regulations to achieve their goals. It struck us that there were certain voids or gaps here. The main gap is the difficulty in securing funds, which we can help alleviate by providing them with the necessary resources and allowing them to use it as they see fit. These organizations are assisting people in various stages of recovery, but they often struggle with fundraising or budget issues. We can step in and fill those gaps, offering our assistance where it’s needed most.>

KASTELER We’re kind of anti-bureaucracy. I’m insubordinate anyway.

CHAPIN (PARAPHRASED) According to Lisa, we frequently discuss our efforts, yet it’s essential to highlight the team that she has carefully assembled. What truly stood out wasn’t merely setting up a website swiftly, but rather how rapidly she managed to assemble a group of highly intelligent individuals. There are some seasoned professionals who have previous experience in foundations and charities, as well as younger team members in support roles with experience in charitable organizations, understanding the nuances of effectiveness. While we possess our own skill set, it’s clear that we don’t rely solely on ourselves.

KASTELER It was crucial that the team we collaborate with not only shares our values, but are also reliable individuals. This is vital for what we undertake together, and fortunately, we’ve never been let down. What stands out about them is their unwavering dedication. The individuals at Wondros are incredibly busy managing numerous clients, yet they make time for us because of their commitment to the work. They truly are dedicated.

It’s important to mention that our board is mostly composed of individuals who have known Matthew for many years. While we may be the public representation, I want to emphasize that this is a tightly-knit group, bound together by their shared history with Matthew.

KASTELER It’s like in any other business, you’re only as good as the people you have with you.

“I’ve been gaming with Matt for decades now, and I’ve got to admit, there’s something special about the guy. It says a lot about his character that he managed to keep such a strong and lasting bond with so many of us gamers over the years.”

KASTELER (Paraphrased) Folks are moving about quite a bit, leading to the saying, “We were as numerous as tissues.” Fortunately for Annette and I, the business didn’t suffer much in this regard, but customers do tend to switch representatives. Matthew remained our representative from the start.

AS A GAMER, We stood by each other’s side through thick and thin. He remained steadfast in his allegiance towards our team, and I can assure you, none of us faltered in our unwavering support for him.

KASTELER Fiercely.

In his lifetime, he had a constant support system in his professional life, which not only assisted him in achieving his goals but also safeguarded and emotionally sustained him. We faced obstacles together, and we stood by him through it all. That’s why I refer to it as a reciprocal relationship. The legacy he passed on was the lasting bond among us – even though he is gone, we continue to be connected, having forged this strong connection over decades of working together.

It appears the foundation gave away $400,000 to various organizations during its initial year. There’s an intriguing initiative I’d like to discuss with you – it supports incarcerated individuals through a remote healthcare service. Unfortunately, I don’t have enough time to go over all the projects, but this one caught my attention.

to establish pre-release telehealth panels that provide continuous care and various forms of support for these individuals. He initiated video introductions to the group as a means to foster engagement and connection. At first, he conducted this once a week at one jail, but we’ve helped him extend it to five days a week to assist more people through the Public Health Institute. Additionally, we aim to gather data on its effectiveness to potentially expand the program to other jails across California and beyond.

KASTELER Approximately two-thirds of the individuals incarcerated struggle with addiction, and it’s disheartening to learn that some states consider it less costly to let them perish rather than providing aid. The work Dr. Herring is undertaking aligns perfectly with our foundation’s character, and we are genuinely thrilled to be supporting him in his endeavors. He is both exceptional and intellectually gifted, much like Dr. Sarah Wakeman based in Boston.

Great segue, because I wanted to ask you about Dr. Wakeman at Massachusetts General Hospital, with whom you’ve partnered to launch the Matthew Perry Fellowship in Addiction Medicine. How did that come about?

DR. WAKEMAN Dr. Wakeman is remarkable. Earlier this year, there was an article in The New York Times discussing addiction in America, and she was featured prominently throughout. We were fortunate enough to have a chance to speak with her, and what we discovered is that medical students typically receive just two hours of instruction on addiction, and there are no exam questions related to it. To address this issue, Dr. Wakeman has developed a year-long program for doctors to participate in, which aims to equip them with the knowledge necessary to treat addiction. Once they complete their training, these doctors can apply their skills in their respective fields, where professionals who specialize in addiction treatment are available for guidance. We’re thrilled about this collaboration, as it marks our first joint endeavor. The first fellow will be chosen in January and will begin their studies the following summer.

PARAPHRASING Dr. Wakeman’s fellowship isn’t just about funding education; it’s also about supporting the fellows during their study period because this opportunity isn’t part of their medical school curriculum, which means they can’t borrow money for it. The fellowship takes care of both the educational expenses and the living costs while they are studying. One of the issues preventing people from getting this education is a lack of support. After spending so many years in medical school, these individuals need jobs right away. Instead of immediately starting work in their chosen specialty to cover living expenses, we aim to provide assistance during their training phase.

KASTELER Our goal is to supply the medical field with more professionals. It’s straightforward. Currently, there’s a shortage of adequately trained doctors, which is why we’ve identified an opportunity and plan to address it by providing more qualified personnel.

Will you be involved in choosing the fellow or is Dr. Wakeman handling that?

CHAPIN In essence, she may gently point out the appropriate individual for this task. We’re not claiming any expertise. Instead, we’ve been seeking out individuals who possess the necessary knowledge and are already making a positive impact. Our role is merely to be discerning enough to identify those worthy of our support.

KASTELER It’s been emphasized many times that Matthew’s name carries immense influence within our sphere. We hold this fact in great esteem and are deeply appreciative of it. One of our key strengths lies in our ability to bring people together, which is something we value highly. We’re currently engaged in discussions about various formats for gatherings that will take place over the course of the next year.

CHAPIN It’s crucial for us to broaden our scope, particularly in terms of the environment we’re working on. Our aim with grassroots initiatives is to disseminate effective strategies and knowledge. One of our advisors often remarks that when he attends seminars or discussions, it’s always filled with doctors or academics discussing research. He questions, “Where are the addicts? Where are those with personal experiences?” We frequently encounter numerous divisions and clusters, some doing commendable work while others perform poorly. There seems to be a lack of knowledge exchange. This is one area we hope to improve with these gatherings.

Can you share more about the vision for the convenings or gatherings? Like a summit or seminar?

We’re currently planning for these events. They will involve a variety of individuals discussing particular topics. However, the main goal is to foster connections among participants, encouraging free and open discussions.

KASTELER I’d like us to mix things up a bit. These gatherings are important, but they should serve a purpose beyond just being pleasant chats about our work. They should stir something within people, awaken them to the issues at hand. It can’t be all sunshine and conversation without addressing the heart of the matter. Everyone has been affected in some way, whether it’s a friend or family member. Let’s bring these issues out into the open for discussion.

What are you most proud of thus far?

As a gamer, I’m honored to be part of the team that’s been able to carry on Matthew’s vision. It’s an achievement we both, Lisa and I, are incredibly proud of. Looking back on this past year, I believe we’ve managed to fulfill what he had in mind, something that makes us feel confident he’d be delighted with our work. This, for me, is the greatest accomplishment of all, and I see it reflected in her nodding head – a silent agreement that speaks volumes.

AS A GAMER, I couldn’t have said it better myself. He knew we’d leap through obstacles for him, and boy, did we! But this year, the feats we’ve achieved together would leave him utterly amazed. The bond we shared with Matthew wasn’t just a professional one, it was more like a partnership, a friendship that spanned over decades. With Doug, it was the same story – not merely a manager-client relationship, but a mutual understanding and trust. Those lines blurred, and he placed his faith in us – something that truly matters. That trust empowers us to excel, and we shall!

What would Matthew say about what you’ve accomplished this past year?

CHAPIN He’d tease us.

KASTELER He would definitely make fun of us for crying as much as we cried, that’s for sure.

CHAPIN He would say, “Thank you.”

KASTELER Matthew was big on expressing gratitude. That was another rare quality, in my experience.

Tackling addiction is emotional work. How are you managing?

Paraphrased The work we do involves a strong emotional component. Although we don’t directly interact with our clients, we listen to their heart-touching and challenging experiences with different institutions. What truly tugs at our heartstrings is Matthew’s story, as it resonates deeply with us. It underscores the fact that his tale mirrors countless others dealing with this disease. Regardless of wealth, gender, location, or other societal factors, they all face a common struggle. This shared battle is what unites them.

We’ve been deeply intertwined with his life experiences, his hardships, and his progression, often finding ourselves returning to his book when we encounter confusion or seek innovative solutions. “Matthew, could you clarify that for me once more?” This sentiment stirs the deepest emotions within me as I strive to complete this statement without shedding tears. It’s a means of preserving his presence among us.

KASTELER Working in this industry for so long has taught me that those who are well-known often face the public’s disapproval during tough times. They’re either expected to recover or disappear altogether, and people become tired of it. However, this never happened to him. I constantly emphasized his popularity, but he didn’t quite grasp it. But when we were touring for the book, I noticed a change in his perception. He saw the shift, even though he couldn’t fully comprehend it. This, to me, is truly remarkable. The burden he carried every day of his life was immense. Now, let me put it plainly, I’ve had clients pass away before, but this was different. It felt like a building had collapsed on us. Particularly because he was doing well and discussions were ongoing about our future plans. Then, he was gone. Frankly, it’s disheartening. I don’t approve of it.

I’d like to express my joy that, on the anniversary of his passing, we’ve managed to achieve so much. It’s been wonderful to discuss the positive legacies he left for us during this time. However, there’s one aspect we haven’t touched upon yet: our ability to carry out our work has been made possible by numerous fans and civilians who have generously donated, as well as through his estate, with the backing of his family who initially invested in our organization.

It’s great that you raised this topic, as I’ve been observing some discussions online regarding the donations and the rationale behind them, given the circumstances surrounding his inheritance…

In this text, There’s been an extraordinary display of backing, and people keep pouring in to support it. The book keeps selling, expanding its reach. Although his death was sudden, Matthew had expressed his intentions before he passed away. We have the initial capital from him and his estate, with the approval of his family, but one of our next steps is to enter the fundraising phase. We wanted to clarify our aspirations for the work we aim to accomplish, but also provide evidence that we’re capable of doing it. That’s the crucial moment during the anniversary as we can discuss not only how much we miss him, but his legacy, what he left behind, and the ongoing work in his honor.

KASTELER We’re combating the belief that since we’re called Matthew, it implies we’re completely financed and don’t have financial issues. However, this isn’t accurate. While we received a great initial investment, fundraising remains crucial for us.

CHAPIN Given our high level of ambition, the initial contribution was quite generous and has allowed us to carry out our current tasks and even make promises for what’s to come. However, to truly achieve our vision, we will require additional financial resources.

How can people help?

CHAPIN Connect with our website for donation options, whether it’s digitally or by mailing a check. If you’re keen on discussing extensive assistance matters, we’d be delighted to engage in such discussions; simply drop us a message.

Upon his departure, his insights about illness and addiction reached far and wide. The sentiment he expressed most frequently was this: “I don’t want it said that I merely had friends when I die. Instead, I wish for [my acts of kindness and helping others] to be the topic of conversation, and I am determined to spend the remainder of my life demonstrating this.” This is a potent message, and one that likely inspires you as well.

CHAPIN Very much so.

KASTELER We’re going to do it.

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2024-10-29 01:57