Pet Shop Days: The Unwatchable Queer Romance Film With No Hope

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In the movie “Pet Shop Days,” a group of pampered young adults from Generation Z engage in a destructive romantic relationship that involves partying, drug use, and criminal activities. The film, featuring Hollywood veterans Willem Dafoe, Peter Sarsgaard, and Maribel Verdú, is so poorly made that it’s almost unbelievable they were involved. It seems there was a significant disconnect between the scripted material and the final product, which appears to have been pieced together haphazardly during post-production years ago. “Pet Shop Days” manages to be devoid of any redeeming qualities. The narrative, performances, and overall production are dismal. MovieWeb doesn’t typically rate movies this poorly, but “Pet Shop Days” comes dangerously close.

In Mexico City, I find myself tangled in bed with my mother, Karla (Maribel Verdú), a situation that’s less than ideal – let me tell you! We both dread attending a birthday celebration for my father, Castro (Jordi Mollà). You see, there’s an unsettled animosity between us; he can’t stand his rebellious and turbulent son, yet cherishes his wife. The dinner turns chaotic with yells and arguments before spiraling out of control entirely.

Abysmal in Every Regard

Simultaneously, in a New York City duplex, 20-year-old Jack (Jack Irv) feels uninterested in having sex with the woman he’s currently with. She storms off angrily. Jack’s mother, Diana (Emmanuelle Seigner), rejects the advances of Francis (Willem Dafoe), a man who wants to exert control over Jack and is displeased by his son’s lack of drive. Jack heads off to work at a nearby aquarium and pet store, where the owner expresses frustration due to Jack’s indifference.

While lounging in my luxurious hotel suite, I come across an ad for a pet store that piques my curiosity. To my surprise, I find myself entering the store and being captivated by Jack, who’s instantly smitten by me. Instead of asking for a job, I propose we forgo our respective tasks and explore an adventurous journey together. As someone who has always harbored feelings for men but never acted on them, I decide to take a chance and embark on a wild escapade with the passionate Alejandro.

A Random and Ugly Film

The narrative in “Pet Shop Days” appears to be heavily dependent on chance events, which can be described as: The plot progression in this series seems overly reliant on sheer coincidence. This could be interpreted as a sign of lackluster scriptwriting.

In a departure from his renowned father, director/co-writer Olmo Schnabel struggles in his first feature film, “Pet Shop Days.” The movie is filmed on gritty film stock using handheld cameras and overly dramatic lighting effects. Each scene seems to be drenched in offensive colors as the shaky camera movements aim to depict a tumultuous love story. Schnabel aims to showcase overwhelming desire and infatuation spinning out of control, affecting everyone involved. However, this approach, while intended to convey intensity, instead becomes increasingly grating with every passing moment.

Unlikable Characters Abound

The secondary storylines in this narrative are just as flawed as the main plot. Characters like Alejandro, Jack, Castro, and Francis struggle with complex father-son relationships. While Alejandro and Castro harbor intense animosity towards each other, a surprising turn of events leads Castro to seek reconciliation with his estranged son. Despite Francis’ genuine affection for Jack, he fails to shape him into the person he believes him to be. In contrast, Jack recognizes his father’s flaws but refuses to allow him any room for personal fulfillment. Unfortunately, these relationships are portrayed in a one-dimensional and unrefined manner.

The subplots involving these characters lack the ability for empathy and forgiveness. They are all self-centered and lack any endearing qualities.

Jack and Alejandro’s exploration of their sexuality seemed like it could have been a transformative experience. However, director Schnabel fails to give them enough screen time to develop a convincing emotional bond. It’s possible for two people to connect instantly, like peanut butter and jelly, but that doesn’t appear to be the case here. Instead, they mostly engage in sexual encounters and excessive drinking, with very little actual conversation. The movie might portray an intense physical attraction leading to questionable decisions, but it’s hard to accept this as a deeply felt love story.

The criminal activities of Alejandro and Jack are almost comical. Their feeble attempts at hiding their identities before executing risky break-ins are mind-boggling. It seems preposterous that they would don a wig and costume but neglect gloves or masks, as if fingerprints and surveillance cameras aren’t factors in Schnabel’s New York City. The sequel introduces another character who miraculously tracks down Alejandro, like a homing pigeon. It all seems illogical. The disheartening part is that the filmmakers don’t appear to be troubled by this lack of logic.

Experiencing Pet Shop Days feels like a squandered opportunity for talented individuals. Towards the end, it seems as though more illogical moments are added, making you wonder if the movie could possibly become any less engaging. Pet Shop Days is produced by MeMo Films, Storyteller Productions, and TWIN. It will be available in selected theaters starting March 14th, distributed by Utopia.

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2025-03-14 22:09