Bitcoin Miners Strike Gold (Sort Of)

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Ah, the wild world of bitcoin mining. Where the brave and the bewildered alike try to strike it rich (or at least not lose their shirts). According to a recent report from JPMorgan, the combined hashrate of 13 U.S.-listed bitcoin miners has hit a record high. Because who doesn’t love a good game of “find the needle in the haystack,” right? 🤯

These miners now account for a whopping 31.5% of the global network. That’s like being the smartest kid in a class of, well, not-so-smart kids. 🤓 The report notes that CleanSpark, Hive Technologies, and Riot Platforms are leading the charge, adding a combined 11 exahashes per second (EH/s) of capacity since April. That’s a lot of… um, math. 🤯

But what does it all mean? Well, the hashrate is like a big game of “keep up with the Joneses.” It’s a measure of the total combined computational power used to mine and process transactions on a proof-of-work blockchain. And if you thought that sounded complicated, just wait until you try to explain it to your grandma. 😂

The network hashrate took a bit of a tumble in the first two weeks of June, falling about 10 EH/s to an average of 890 EH/s. But don’t worry, it’s still up over 50% year-on-year. Because who needs stability when you can have rollercoaster-like fluctuations? 🎠

And then there’s the hash price, a measure of daily mining profitability. That dropped 2% from the end of May, because why not? 🤷‍♂️ The total market cap of the 13 companies rose 10%, or $2.4 billion, in the first two weeks of the month. But let’s be real, that’s just a drop in the bucket compared to the real money being made in bitcoin mining: the money being lost. 😂

Riot outperformed the group with a 20% gain, while Bitfarms underperformed with a 9% decline. Because in the world of bitcoin mining, you’re either on top of the world or crawling out of a hole. 🌟

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2025-06-16 19:28