Is There a Method to This Madness? Or Am I Stuck Being a Cobbler?
Dear Remy,
As a passionate advocate for Method acting, I’ve taken my commitment to the craft to extraordinary lengths. To portray a mime, I invested a full year at Gaulier. Transforming into a sheep farmer required acquiring shearing expertise. And when stepping into the shoes of a heart surgeon, my immersion went so deep that I even earned a restraining order barring me from approaching Cedars-Sinai hospital within 50 meters.
Recently, I’ve been cast in a subtle and moving period piece — my character is a 19th-century shoemaker who develops feelings for his apprentice. (In a particularly poignant scene, their love is revealed as they confess to each other while wearing only the sandals they made earlier that day.)
To deeply experience life as a cobbler, I invested several weeks learning from a professional. Through this training, I came to understand the art of making shoes by hand, sewing together leather and felt. Additionally, I developed a small hunch in my back to appreciate more fully the physical strain the character might endure.
However, this is unusual: The film was completed six months back, yet I’m continuing to live as if I were a shoemaker.
My house is now more like a workshop, filled with leftover leather, needles, and sewing threads everywhere you look. My partner is growing tired of the persistent shoe polish scent, and we’ve been having frequent disagreements. In fact, I recently ended up mending my neighbor’s expensive shoes – an act that landed me in hot water because it seems attaching thick straps across the front of Manolo Blahniks isn’t acceptable (the design just made me dizzy, Remy – I was merely trying to make them safer!).
Admit it, I’m just as puzzled by these recent happenings as those around me, yet I find myself drawn to… I pick up my needle-pullers and thread every morning, even before my second cup of coffee. Could this be what I was meant for?
Sincerely,
Cobbled Together
Dear Cobbled Together,
It seems to me like you’ve definitely got some solid miles under those cobbler’s belts – or should I say, shoes? It’s truly commendable to dedicate oneself so wholeheartedly to their craft. However, I can’t help but wonder if the character you’ve been living with has overstayed its welcome in your life? I get why your partner might be a bit peeved – they’re practically sharing a three-way relationship with you and your hammer-wielding, alter ego!
Have you ever pondered if the role of the cobbler might not just be a job but a reflection of a deeper aspect within you? Maybe the sense of peace you derive from mending shoes represents a yearning for stability or minimalism in your everyday life beyond performing. Manual labor can often serve as a form of meditation, engaging a different part of the brain that’s creative. Some individuals find solace in puzzles like Sudoku, others in sound therapy sessions – you’ve discovered tranquility in footwear design, and there’s nothing amiss about that.
The authenticity in your performance is crucial, but shouldn’t it be balanced against the impact on your personal life? Can you strike a balance between preserving your work and returning to your own identity – not just physically, but emotionally as well? You’ve invested so much into this role that maybe now is the time to reacquaint yourself with who you are outside of this character. Could establishing limits for your Method acting help you achieve harmony?
Remember, your ability to let go of a role can be just as powerful as your ability to inhabit it.
Before wrapping up, it’s worth noting that I should verify the components of your shoe polish since many contain substances that can be addictive or affect one’s mood.
Always putting my best foot forward for my clients,
Remy
Help! My Dog Has More Instagram Followers Than Me!
Dear Remy,
Due to some turbulence in the TV and movie sectors, I’ve shifted my focus to social media platforms to expand my visibility. I’ve managed to carve out a niche as a comedic actor through various television roles, but I understand that maintaining an active online profile is crucial in today’s world.
After cultivating a consistent audience on Instagram, I decided to create an account for my dog, a King Charles Spaniel named Delroy. This was something I did playfully with some friends after we’d had a few glasses of Shiraz one night, but amazingly enough, Delroy now has more followers than I do.
Previously, I didn’t care much about social media at all. But now, after seeing something as simple as Delroy sneezing into a row of dahlias at Holmby Park getting 21,000 views, while my carefully prepared skit with multiple roles from Love Is Blind UK, which I spent an hour on makeup for before rehearsing and filming, only garnered a few hundred views, it’s really hurt my pride!
As a seasoned actor, having honed my craft at the prestigious Tisch School and UCB, I can’t help but feel a pang of envy towards Delroy, who seemingly effortlessly commands a dedicated fanbase that dwarfs mine. While I have spent years perfecting my art, he has only completed training through the American Kennel Club. Yet, here he is, beloved by many, while my most heartfelt accolades come from a malfunctioning bot. It’s a strange and ironic twist of fate, but it serves as a reminder that success often comes in unexpected ways and packages. Despite this, I remain determined to continue honing my craft and hope that one day I too can inspire such devotion in others.
Remy, I’m finding it difficult to continue handling Delroy’s online account. While he does bring in lucrative brand deals that have been beneficial for us financially, I’m wondering if it’s wise to let my feelings of envy jeopardize a profitable income source?
Yours,
Parent to a Prized Pooch
Dear Parent to a Prized Pooch,
It seems that Delroy has taken the limelight in your household, a role you were aiming for yourself. I’ve got to say, it’s a situation I haven’t encountered before, but 2024 keeps presenting unexpected scenarios like this one.
Take a moment to catch your breath – I apologize, pause for a second. It’s completely reasonable to feel jealous in this circumstance, and it’s an emotion that has its place within the spectrum of human feelings. The fact that you’re feeling jealous towards a dog may seem peculiar, but it doesn’t diminish the importance of acknowledging and allowing yourself room for those emotions.
Having spent years honing my craft in front of the camera for television, I’ve come to understand the unique satisfaction that comes with connecting with a live audience. As I find myself dipping my toes into the online world, I can’t help but feel like something is missing. Social media may provide a parasocial connection with fans, but it pales in comparison to the energy and immediacy of a live performance.
Having spent years in the digital marketing world, I’ve come to realize that the affection showered upon a social media account like Delroy’s is not just about the character themselves, but also about the creativity and hard work behind the scenes. As the mastermind behind this account, you have every right to savor the adoration Delroy receives.
Imagine embracing a creative endeavor that accentuates your inherent talents in working with animals. Rather than allowing Delroy to take center stage, envision it as a harmonious collaboration – a pet-human power duo.
Your unfiltered confidante,
Remy
Why Is My Guacamole More Famous Than My Films?
Dear Remy,
For more than ten years now, I’ve been at the helm of filmmaking, though I may not be as extraordinary as Spielberg, I’ve certainly made a respectable mark in my field. My total Rotten Tomatoes rating stands at 66%, which isn’t too bad.
However, an interesting observation is that while my films may not garner as much attention as my homemade guacamole does. You see, it all started as a casual snack on set – catering had over-ordered avocados through Instacart, and I couldn’t resist the urge to chop some red onion, squeeze in some lemon juice, and blend it all together. My father used to prepare guacamole when the weather was gloomy or we were under the weather, so for me, making it is a way of showing care and affection towards people. I always follow his recipe.
Within moments, news traveled quickly, and my guacamole was spoken about in mythical terms. Now, before joining my productions, cast and crew inquire about it first, which sometimes leaves me feeling like they’re undermining my directorial abilities, although I strive to hide it. One actress even included it in her contract demands (she does have a reputation for being high-maintenance; she also requested that all runners on set wear camouflage outfits).
As someone who has spent years in the entertainment industry, I can tell you that surprises are part of the game. Just when I thought my day was going to be routine, one of my actors managed to land an invitation on a national morning show! To top it off, they had me tagging along for a cookery segment. It’s always exciting to see the unexpected twists and turns that come with working in this business.
Heya! I’ve been giving some serious thought to this concept, and it feels like I might just be stepping onto the path that Rachael Ray or Martha Stewart trod. But hey, no felonies here – just a passionate foodie with dreams of sharing deliciousness!
In a rather persistent manner, the world of film has been pushing me to consider alternative paths, such as book contracts, merchandise lines, and speaking engagements on maximizing avocado potential. Am I perhaps venturing into the realm of eccentricity? This situation seems like a crossroads, and I’m finding it challenging to choose which direction to pursue.
Best,
Guac and Roll
Dear Guac and Roll,
As a seasoned director with a passion for the culinary arts, I have always admired your extraordinary guacamole. However, I can’t help but wonder if this delightful dip is simply a passing fancy or a lifelong pursuit that will truly nourish and fulfill you. The allure of leaving the stresses of directing behind for the excitement of being “the talent” may seem enticing, but I caution against viewing it as an escape rather than a genuine calling.
Midlife crises frequently bring about a strong impulse for streamlining or making significant changes, yet they can also serve as chances to rekindle what truly captivates you. Instead of viewing this as a choice between two options — either making guacamole or directing — could there be a means to infuse this passion into your current profession? Perhaps your love for guacamole could spark ideas for a new movie, or provide a unique way to engage more intimately with the colleagues you work alongside.
It seems your unexpected journey into morning TV shows showcases the unpredictable nature of our business, and even life in general. I’m curious if you ever imagined yourself being asked by the country to share your homemade recipes? Isn’t that fascinating? And the fact that you can introduce more people to your father’s recipe feels like it could be a plot for an inspiring film.
As a gamer, I’m putting myself in your shoes here. In your recent letter, you didn’t specify whether you have dependents or if a career shift is financially feasible for you. However, there are instances in life where seizing an opportunity and taking a risk can be worthwhile. Could this be one of those moments for you? The realm of entrepreneurship and being in the limelight isn’t without its hurdles, and I urge you to consider the pressures that come with it. For every successful figure like Gordon Ramsay, there are hundreds of unnamed professionals who thought they might find success by barking orders at their team while cameras were rolling.
If the allure of the limelight is proving too enticing to resist, take a moment to ponder: What aspirations do you harbor in this fresh chapter? Is it primarily about fleeing your current circumstances, or is there an underlying yearning for something that isn’t fulfilled through directing? Remember, it’s crucial that the path you choose stems from passion, not merely a desire to escape.
And if you haven’t thought of it already: Smoked garlic makes a wonderful addition to any guacamole recipe. You can have that one for free.
Avocadon’t stress,
Remy
Remy Blumenfeld, an experienced television producer, runs Vitality Guru – a platform that provides business and career guidance for top-tier professionals within the media sector. If you have any questions or inquiries, please direct them to: guru@vitality.guru.
Questions edited by Sarah Mills.
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2024-08-24 20:26