EU’s Sanction Shenanigans: Garantex Gets the Boot! 🚀💰

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In a move that could only be described as “Oh, look! Another round of sanctions!” the European Union has decided to add the crypto exchange Garantex to its ever-growing list of naughty entities. This is akin to putting a “Do Not Enter” sign on a door that was already locked by the U.S. Treasury’s OFAC. Talk about double-locking your doors! 🔒

Garantex, the Russian crypto exchange that has been playing hide-and-seek with the law, has now been officially sanctioned by the E.U. as part of a new round of penalties. It seems the E.U. is on a mission to curb financial networks that are supporting Moscow, which is a bit like trying to stop a river with a spoon. 🌊

Now, let’s not forget that Garantex was already on the U.S. Treasury’s naughty list since 2022. The E.U. has now added it to its sixteenth sanctions package, which, if you’re counting, targets a whopping 48 individuals and 35 entities that are “directly supporting the Russian war effort.” It’s like a really bad game of Monopoly, where everyone keeps landing on “Go to Jail.” 🏦

“For the first time, the Council also decided to sanction a cryptocurrency exchange based in Russia, Garantex, which is closely associated with EU-sanctioned Russian banks.”

The Council of the E.U.

But wait, there’s more! This sanctions package also includes businesses that are helping Russia play hopscotch around trade restrictions, three firms that are moving Russian crude oil (because who doesn’t love a bit of oil?), and a Chinese satellite imagery provider that’s been accused of giving the Russian military a helping hand. It’s like a game of “Who’s Who” but with more intrigue and fewer tea parties. ☕

As of now, the European Union has sanctioned over 2,400 individuals and entities tied to Russia. Officials are practically rubbing their hands together in glee, ready to unleash even more sanctions if the mood strikes them. It’s like a never-ending buffet of penalties! 🍽️

Garantex, bless its heart, was previously sanctioned by OFAC in April 2022 for its role in facilitating transactions with some rather unsavory characters from the darknet. This includes funds from the infamous Russian Ransomware-as-a-Service gang, Conti, and the now-defunct Hydra darknet marketplace. It’s a bit like being the last kid picked for dodgeball, but in the world of crypto. 🏐

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2025-02-24 15:49