As I read through Lezley McSpadden-Head’s moving account, I am struck by her unyielding resilience and indomitable spirit. The loss of Michael O.D. Brown and her husband, both at the hands of violence, has left an indelible mark on her life, yet she continues to stand tall in the face of adversity.
Every time I walk past the patch on Canfield Drive where my son was taken from me, I can still feel the gravel and asphalt pieces they gave me in remembrance. The city replaced that section of road, but that square remains untouched, a constant reminder of that fateful day. It’s a struggle to traverse that cracked, pothole-ridden street, yet it’s the one spot I can’t avoid. Each time I pass by, I’m reminded of those four and a half hours he lay there, pursued, shot, and discarded like waste in a dump. That day was sweltering hot, with temperatures soaring over 90 degrees, and the sun mercilessly scorching his body, left uncovered for all to see. The image of him there remains etched in my mind. I find it difficult to return to that place, but every year I make the trip, not for myself, but to ensure those responsible know justice has yet to be served.
Every year, there’s a memorial dedicated to Mike, marking the tenth anniversary this time around. However, it’s challenging for me to be present. The atmosphere recalls the day he passed away – the day he was taken from us violently. I continue to grieve the loss of my son, and without resolution, it feels as if Mike’s life is cut short again and again, making it a full decade without justice, accountability, or peace. Rather than drowning in sorrow over his death, I choose to honor his life and birthday instead, recognizing that the life he lived outweighs the tragic ending he met. Since that fateful day, I’ve been hesitant to make plans – a lesson I didn’t comprehend until August 9, 2014, when one phone call abruptly altered my plans, reshaped my life, and, in hindsight, impacted the world significantly. To this very moment, that call ignited a relentless pursuit of justice that led me to the United Nations (UN), bringing global attention to the unjust treatment my family endured. I remain committed to reopening Mike’s case and seeking the accountability he rightfully deserves.
In the wake of an intense whirlwind of despair, sorrow, bewilderment, and guilt, that mission took shape. My family was being tormented by the Ku Klux Klan, while many supported Officer Darren Wilson, leaving me feeling lonely and questioning. I grappled with questions like, “Why did my son have to perish? Why is his death receiving more focus than other boys in similar situations?”
In 2015, I established The Michael O.D. Brown We Love Our Children Foundation as a sanctuary for mothers similar to myself. This initiative served as a means for me to cope with the sorrow and isolation I experienced. My responsibilities multiplied rapidly, and I was unexpectedly bestowed the title of “The Mother of a Movement.” However, others soon criticized my efforts, leaving me feeling unprepared and devastated. My heart was shattered, and it felt as if an unbearable burden had been placed upon me. With each anniversary of his passing, the conversations surrounding it become increasingly overwhelming. Everyone seems eager to revisit the topic, and it appears that some have exploited the tragedy for their own fundraising purposes. This is not just, because Mike becomes lost amidst all the noise.
As a parent who has tragically lost a child to senseless violence, I understand the profound pain and despair that follows such a devastating loss. My heart aches for all families who have experienced this unimaginable grief, regardless of their ethnicity or background.
Everything I carry out is done in memory of Mike, and his life forms the basis for the four core principles of our foundation: well-being, fairness, kinship, and learning.
Health
Mike has had high blood pressure since he was 14 years old and has been taking medication ever since. To spread awareness among young people about living healthily, I’m sharing this information. Additionally, we collaborated with the Jennings School District to establish a gardening program that educates students on self-reliance, sustainability, and the benefits of “homegrown” foods for a balanced diet.
Justice
For five years, I collaborated with law students at Howard University, advocating for legislative reforms such as the Mike Brown bill (H.R.8914), reintroduced by Congresswoman Cori Bush. This proposed legislation aims to expand access to mental and behavioral health services for individuals who have experienced violent interactions with law enforcement. The ultimate goal is to alter public perspectives, increase awareness about systemic problems, particularly systemic racism, and bring about necessary change.
Family
We offer grief management and self-care programs for mothers. We also provide support groups and financial assistance to help families heal and rebuild after loss.
Education
As a passionate gamer, I’m deeply involved in nurturing the future generation’s potential. We offer interactive programs like ‘Gamers’ Den’ and ‘Pixel Pals’, where we teach kids about entrepreneurship, finance management, and budgeting in a fun, engaging way. I’ve even established a Memorial Scholarship, an initiative inspired by Mike, a fellow graduate who was tragically taken the year after Wilson’s incident. Had he lived, he would have been eligible for this scholarship, which we’ve recently awarded to 15 deserving students this year.
However, acknowledging Mike transcends mere scholarships and initiatives; it encompasses addressing the mental health issues that have significantly impacted our household as well.
As a concerned parent and ardent fan of justice, I can’t help but feel the pain of Mike’s loss resonates deeply within me. Officer Wilson didn’t merely snatch Mike’s life; he robbed my other sons of their exuberance, their youthful voices that once echoed with laughter and dreams. For years, they’ve been shrouded in silence and timidity. My eldest son is about to turn 20, the same age Mike was when his life was tragically cut short. The weight of grief from losing both his brother and father has left an indelible mark on him as he steps into manhood.
What struck me even more was his decision to select a church in Ferguson. To me, it shows great courage on his part, and I admire him for conquering his past struggles and finding solace in his belief.
We’ve all encountered mental health hurdles, each of us seeking therapy at different times. My daughter first attended college, but when her peers learned about her identity, it became too much, leading to her dropping out and returning home. I still have my low moments, where feelings of loss drag me under, but I try my best to get through it. Though the world seems to be moving forward, the void we feel is always with us. I find solace by helping others every day. Unfortunately, the racial prejudice we experienced only added to our pain and sense of isolation.
It’s regrettably true that racism persists; the discrimination I encountered and the discord I experienced following Mike’s demise served as stark reminders of this fact. My first encounter with the N-word occurred after I lost Mike. Ferguson, where we lived, was once a town that did not welcome Black people after sunset, known as a “sundown town.” Bob McCulloch, who served as the seven-term St. Louis County Prosecutor, had a reputation for never bringing charges against cops or ensuring fair trials for Black people, possibly due to a personal grudge stemming from a Black man killing his father (who was also a police officer) many years ago.
Although we’ve made strides, the pursuit of justice remains challenging due to various hurdles. The legislative system moves slowly, and opposition is formidable. Initially, my bill, bearing my son’s name, was overlooked. This was painful, but we transformed it into the Helping Families Heal Act and are making another attempt. I’m also striving to rename a street in Mike’s honor—a symbolic gesture, as I find it difficult to return to that location. I’ve taken this cause as far as the United Nations, ensuring the world is aware of this injustice. People care. Re-examining Mike’s case for a fair investigation has become crucial in my quest for justice. Officer Wilson was never indicted, and we didn’t go to trial because the investigation wasn’t robust enough. I refuse to accept this outcome.
It’s essential that people understand the necessity of enacting laws that safeguard Black individuals, and we need these protections in place before another unfortunate event occurs. If we truly aspire to be recognized as complete human beings rather than mere fractions, we must speak up about this. If we seek equality, we must actively call for it. If we desire justice, we must pursue it relentlessly. The struggle for Mike is a quest for justice that he and countless others rightfully deserve. I will not cease my efforts until my son’s memory lives on as a symbol of change, unity, and hope for all families.
Lezley McSpadden-Head is a well-known author and activist for social justice, primarily recognized as Michael O.D. Brown’s mother, the African-American teenager who died at the hands of police officer Darren Wilson in Ferguson, Missouri on August 9, 2014. This tragic event sparked the Black Lives Matter movement. Born and raised in a tight-knit neighborhood, McSpadden-Head was only 16 when she gave birth to her son, affectionately referred to as “Mike Mike.” His untimely passing deeply affected her, pushing her into the national limelight. In her memoir, “Tell the Truth & Shame the Devil,” McSpadden-Head recounts her experiences as a mother and the special bond she shared with her son, providing a moving account that underscores her remarkable strength and resilience. Through her compelling storytelling, she continues to fight for justice and reform, giving voice to those affected by systemic inequalities.
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2024-08-12 23:25