KCD 2’s Henry Is Exactly How I Like My RPG Men—Raw, Unhinged, Scruffy

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I’m constantly questioning how Henry‘s still standing after everything we’ve been through.

Instead of being seen as a hero or legendary figure, he’s merely an ordinary individual who, one morning, chose to navigate the challenges of medieval times much like an inebriated peasant occasionally tumbling from his horse.

But with heartfelt honesty, that’s what made him fit the bill for how I like my RPG men.

Henry possesses an uncooked charm that’s utterly endearing: he’s a jester from the Middle Ages devoid of prophetic burdens, relying only on serendipity and courage to confront life’s unpredictable challenges.

Unlike most RPG characters who are initially proficient, Henry begins his journey as an individual fortunate enough not to be accidentally self-harming. On one occasion, I attempted to stealthily infiltrate a noble’s residence, but instead of a quiet and seamless entry, Henry stumbled over a bucket which then rolled noisily down the corridor.

In a panic, I attempted to disguise my fluster by improvising a cover-up story – until Henry unexpectedly whistled during my purse-snatching act, instantly exposing me. At that moment, I understood that Henry was as clumsy at stealth as I was, and decided to embrace the chaos that followed.

At the wedding contest, I had high expectations of emerging victorious, but alas, Henry suffered a total defeat. To make things more enjoyable, I learned later that my victory over him was so overwhelming that he attended his own wedding with traces of blood still on him.

There’s nothing quite as amusing as another one of Henry’s wedding moments, where he danced with a woman, feigned deep affection, and then ended up in bed with her, only to hear the next morning that the encounter was less than satisfying. Poor Henry, left stunned and silent, had to endure it. Some fans were genuinely upset, but I found it hilarious – it’s about time my man Henry experienced a dose of his own charm!

Instead of characterizing Henry as a maniac, consider describing his predicament by saying he often finds himself in circumstances that inexplicably turn out wrong for him, despite his good intentions. Essentially, mayhem appears to be an unavoidable companion wherever he goes.

Initially, I chose to embark on the seemingly straightforward and effortless Cuman quest. However, what followed next was unexpected as Henry found himself inebriated, serenading tunes with the Cumans and somehow managing to convince them he was part of their tribe.

In an unexpected turn of events, it seemed as if things couldn’t possibly deteriorate further. Yet, the Cuman I had been dealing with suddenly woke up and bolted towards his encampment. Stranded, I found myself in a state of inebriation, bewilderment, and grasping onto a pilfered barrel of alcohol, while emitting an unpleasant gas.

Mostly, I find myself navigating my day by cleverly evading suspicion of a crime. When the guard confronted me and Henry, in a stroke of genius, he tried to feign deafness from a past battle wound. However, the guard momentarily hesitated before ultimately shaking his head and issuing me a fine regardless.

Henry’s excuses for his actions, in particular, are a unique brand of comedy. Examples include, “I was really starving,” and “It was self-defense; he seemed like he was about to hit me.” My favorite, however, has to be when he tried to justify rummaging through someone’s bag: “There was a bee hovering over it.

Or the instance when Henry emerged victorious from that brawl at the bar, narrowly escaping with his life. Upon exiting, a person promptly inquired if he fancied another round. Given his condition (bruised and barely standing), it was no surprise that Henry merely nodded and re-entered the establishment.

If Henry had a guiding principle, it might be, “Cleanliness is for the faint-hearted,” as Henry is noticeably and offensive unclean, even compared to characters in role-playing games who may not always maintain pristine hygiene.

Among the cherished experiences, there was one particular instance that stood out: Upon arriving at a grand court following an extensive voyage, my appearance and odor suggested I had waded through a marsh. The noble recoiled, wrinkling his nose while gesturing for me to depart until I cleaned up, at least washing my face.

In most Role-Playing Games (RPGs), you can disregard personal hygiene, but King’s Court Duel 2 immerses you in the consequences. I decided it was past time for Henry to visit the bathhouse to wash away the odor and the disapproving glances. However, as soon as we entered, every worker in the bathhouse simultaneously assumed a T-pose stance. I promptly turned around and exited, suspecting that perhaps Henry’s filthiness was too much for them to handle.

At one point, Henry found himself lingering in proximity as two characters engaged in conversation. One of them idly questioned what had such a foul odor, and without uttering a single word, the camera subtly zoomed towards Henry, who stood there with a knowing smirk on his face, suggesting it was indeed him causing the stink.

1. Henry’s attempts at flirting are as unsuccessful as his other endeavors. The most amusing instance was when he tried to justify strangling a woman, saying, “Women adore that!” This remark was so preposterous that even the guards hesitated before merely cautioning him.

2. Henry’s flirting attempts are as dismal as his other undertakings. My favorite example of this was when he attempted to defend strangling a woman, exclaiming, “Women find it appealing!” This statement was so ludicrous that not even the guards could suppress their surprise before deciding to simply warn him.

3. Henry’s flirting is as disastrous as everything else. My preferred example of this was when he tried to explain strangling a woman by saying, “Women love it!” This comment was so absurd that not even the guards could resist a moment of confusion before deciding to merely reprimand him.

4. Henry’s flirting efforts are as unlucky as his other actions. My favorite instance of this was when he attempted to justify strangling a woman, claiming, “Women appreciate it!” This statement was so ridiculous that not even the guards could help but pause before deciding on a warning instead.

5. Henry’s flirting is just as unsuccessful as everything else. My favorite example of this was his ludicrous explanation for strangling a woman, “Women enjoy it!” This statement was so absurd that not even the guards could refrain from a momentary hesitation before deciding on a warning instead.

In a moment that I’d rather forget, I found myself attempting to act as a translator between a Cuman and a woman I admired, despite not having a single word of Hungarian in my vocabulary. Unfortunately, my efforts backfired, offending the woman on behalf of the Cuman. It wasn’t until I was abruptly hit in the face that I fully understood the gravity of my mistake.

Despite my strong desire to erase from memory that ludicrous come-on he used, “It’s raining, let’s have sex,” I remain bewildered by his audacity. The absurdity of the line is undeniable, yet somehow it managed to be effective. It’s nothing short of classic Henry Rizz.

In this game, Henry’s most formidable adversary isn’t the Cumans or the guards. Instead, it’s his own digestive tract that poses the greatest challenge. The number of instances where his flatulence has spoiled a moment is beyond calculation, yet I find myself fondly attached to each one.

Once upon a time, I quietly sneaked past a sentry post, attempting not to be noticed. As I was about to slip away unnoticed, Henry let out an ear-splitting fart, waking up the guard next to him instantly. I bolted immediately, but alas, Henry, in his usual cleverness, stumbled and fell flat on his face on the ground due to tripping over his own feet.

One memorable moment I had was when Henry, clearly inebriated, let out such a powerful fart during our chat that the Non-Player Character paused their dialogue and left. It seems Henry’s gaseous emissions are as unpredictable as his alcohol consumption!

In the moment when Henry, standing by the pond, had a smug expression as two women argued over an overwhelmingly deceased odor, the camera indeed swung to focus on him. This timing had me in stitches with laughter.

In the scene where Henry stood near the ponging pond, chuckling while two ladies argued about an appalling stench, it turned out that the camera moved right towards him at just the right moment. I couldn’t help but burst into laughter from the timing.

1) He’s the kind of person who crashes into a barrier without flinching, as if it were an everyday occurrence. He’s like a catastrophe from the Middle Ages that keeps causing chaos in grandiose fashion, and I wouldn’t want him to change for anything.

In most Role-Playing Games (RPGs), you’re made to feel like an illustrious hero, a battle-tested warrior chosen for the grand task of saving the world. However, King’s Court 2 (KCD 2) places you in the shoes of someone who’s just woken up, put on his trousers backward, and is now fleeing from guards because he unintentionally clocked a noble in the face.

Henry embodies the transformation that occurs when a non-player character takes on the lead role with a spark of life. Constantly teetering on the brink of historical significance, albeit for unfortunate reasons.

Henry of Skalitz, you absolute disaster of a man—never change.

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2025-02-26 07:43