Kiyosaki Foresees Doom, Puts Faith in Bitcoin – Has the Ruble Turned Into Soup Yet?

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Citizens, gather round! The financial stage is alight, and *who* dances beneath the spotlights but Robert Kiyosaki himself — investor, guru, author, and, some whisper, clairvoyant of the market apocalypse. Author of “Rich Dad Poor Dad,” a book waved about at dinner parties as much as Moscow snow is brushed from boots, Kiyosaki has once again thundered forth an omen to the crowd: the market teeters, Bitcoin glimmers, and the dollar, well, prepare to mop up with it.

At the time of his pronouncement, the community (that ever-watchful, coffee-spilling mob) received news delivered with the cheerfulness of a Muscovite traffic warden: catastrophe is nigh, but also perhaps, opportunity knocks — with all the subtlety of a stray cow on Arbat Street. 🐄📉

Biggest Stock Market Crash: Second (or Sixtieth?) Warning

Yes, yes, Kiyosaki admits he’s “REPEATING MY SELF AGAIN,” but repetition, like vodka shots, is tradition. Referencing “Rich Dad’s Prophecy” (sequel to “How to Lose Friends and Influence Economists”), he announced that the “biggest stock market crash in history” is not merely coming, but has packed its suitcase and is pounding on the door. In the early 2000s, he predicted the “imminent” collapse, which, like a Russian winter, just refuses to end.

REPEATING MY SELF AGAIN: From my book Rich Dads Prophecy, my prediction of the biggest stock market crash in history….is now happening now.

I hope I am wrong….but as I forecasted…the biggest market crashes in stocks, bonds, and real estate….are about to happen in the very…

— Robert Kiyosaki (@theRealKiyosaki) May 4, 2025

Thus, dear reader, like a prudent Muscovite stuffing turnips into his winter boots, Kiyosaki diversified: gold, silver, Bitcoin. In times of tumult, every household needs a little something shiny to bury in the garden. 🪙🌱

Silver Explosion? Or Merely Sparkling in the Moonlight

Kiyosaki, never content with a mere tremor, now peers into his crystal ball and declares: “Silver price to explode 2x!” He predicts by 2026, silver will leap from $35 to a stately $70 per ounce. Investors should prepare themselves — or at least their wallets — for this “explosion,” though perhaps don’t quit your day job at the samovar just yet. ☕️🥈

Meanwhile, with the crash looming overhead like an overzealous bureaucrat, Kiyosaki solemnly intones the dreaded curse: if disaster unfolds, “the Fed and Treasury will print trillions in fake dollars…” Picture Uncle Sam at the printing press, sleeves rolled, lost in a delirious flurry of funny money. Such “M2 money supply” expansion, Kiyosaki claims, will summon the kind of inflation that would make even a Soviet grocer blush.

In the end, our prophet delivers his gospel with the intensity of a man who once bet his rent on the rouble: “I do not trust the Fed and Treasury” — after all, their presses whir louder than Moscow in rush hour. Thus he seeks shelter behind three sturdy guardians: gold, silver, and Bitcoin. “I trust gold, silver, and Bitcoin to protect me from the coming massive inflation,” he confides, shaking his head mournfully at the shrinking US dollar — a currency, in his view, with the staying power of a St. Petersburg umbrella. ☔️💸

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2025-05-05 11:30