You Won’t Believe How Worldcoin Checks If You’re Human in the USA 🤖🧑

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Oy vey, get a load of this: Worldcoin—yes, that Worldcoin, cooked up by Sam “I’m Not a Robot, I Promise” Altman—has finally crash-landed in the United States. There he was, on stage, big grin, waving a picture that screams, “Now available in the USA.” What does this mean, you ask? Physical locations, baby! Because nothing says futuristic crypto like dragging real humans out to real places.

The big idea is to build an anonymous financial network. (Because the IRS loves a good hide-and-seek.) But here’s the kicker: They use biometrics. Not just a handshake or a wink, they want your precious eyeballs—or something like that—for “proof of personhood.” No bots allowed, and absolutely no AI pretending to be your Uncle Murray from Brooklyn. In the Land of the Free, you get to waltz into a Worldcoin joint and prove, once and for all, that you are not a charming pile of algorithms.

According to a tweet (because how else do you announce global financial revolutions these days?), this little ritual allows you to access all the network’s doors and windows, while keeping your anonymity intact. It’s all very dignified. We’ve got World ID, World App, maybe a World Schmear for the bagels—basically, you’ll get a fancy digital identity, and it’s all on the blockchain. Because blockchains, like pastrami, make everything better.

So, what’s the reaction? Let’s just say, if crypto forums had tomatoes, the stage would be a salad bar right now. Some people love it, others are squinting suspiciously at the words “biometric verification” like it’s a trick from an old vaudeville act. Either way, Worldcoin’s marching in—ready or not—and they’re not just bringing crypto to Americans, they’re making you prove you’re a full-blooded, carbon-based lifeform. Can’t wait for the day they ask for your mother’s brisket recipe as extra proof of humanity.

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2025-05-04 18:55