100,000 BTC Disappears from Exchanges—Are The Hodlers Preparing for Tsar-Level Gains?

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Permit me, dear reader, to draw back the velvet curtain of finance and usher you into the circus: Bitcoin (BTC)—now prancing, pirouetting ever closer to its all-time high of $108,786 like a prima ballerina gazing longingly at her favorite pair of gold-encrusted slippers. Less than 5%! Did someone whisper déjà vu, or was it just the ghost of January’s market euphoria passing by with a sly wink?

As the Digital Rouble Rumbles: BTC Decamps from Exchanges

Today, on the marketplace formerly known as Twitter but now forced to wear an “X” like an exiled general, veteran analyst Ali Martinez delivers thunderbolts: in just three weeks, 100,000 BTC have performed a Houdini, vanishing from exchanges. In late March, exchange reserves lounged at 3.11 million BTC, but as of May 13, they’ve shrunk to a mere 3.02 million. One feels for them—these coins, fleeing like Muscovites before a tax inspector.

Falling BTC reserves on the exchanges? Why, it’s manna for those who believe in supply scarcity the way my dear Professor Preobrazhensky believed in the mighty power of borscht. Scarcity could send prices hurtling upward faster than a Moscow taxi at rush hour. Investors, it seems, are treating BTC at current prices like a well-aged bottle of cognac—best kept and not poured out carelessly.

Martinez, in a separate diatribe—again on “X”, that site for cryptic fortune-tellers and modern-day soothsayers—points to a rising Accumulation Trend Score (ATS). Like a bureaucrat’s moustache, it grows, suggesting that enthusiasm and possibly dinner parties, are on the rise. History tells us, often after a stiff drink, that this trend sometimes rings in a glorious rally for BTC. Or it could just be indigestion—who can tell with these signals?

And now, for your consideration: should BTC vault over $105,244 (not even a princely sum for a Petrograd dacha!), we may see a short squeeze to the tune of $25.38 million. Somewhere, a bear is already looking for a new line of work.

Meanwhile, an oracle named Jelle announces that BTC has fallen into a “Power of Three setup” on lower timeframes—a dance in three acts: accumulation, expansion, then distribution. Not unlike a night at the Bolshoi: first, the crowd fills the seats; then, the drama unfolds; at last, everyone argues about who should have taken the lead. Should the pattern conclude as foretold, $112,000 could be just over the horizon. Or, as the locals say: “A day without vodka is a day wasted.” 🍸

For those who have never heard of the Power of Three, picture the market as a cunning dog: first, it digs; then, it runs; then, it buries your slippers in the garden. Investment strategies were never so… canine.

Crypto analyst Ash Crypto, not to be outdone, waves a chart in the air, thrilling over BTC’s weekly MACD bullish crossover like a schoolboy showing off forged parental signatures. Evidently, history says bullish crossovers precede flying prices. If history lies, well—what are analysts for? 🤷

Before the Storm—Or the Lull of a Particularly Unruly Samovar?

Presently, BTC appears to be loitering in the low $100,000s, perhaps enjoying a smoke and reminiscing about its youth. TradingView’s RLindia assures us the party may just be getting started: a new all-time high between $106,000 and $110,000 is expected. Hopefully, the champagne doesn’t run out first.

Still, a word of caution whispered through the marble halls: BTC’s famous indifference to good news. Despite lower-than-expected US CPI data, BTC moved just 0.2%, as if it had merely been offered second-rate caviar. As of this writing, our stoic hero trades at $103,344, up a scant fraction in 24 hours, and absolutely not interested in anything but itself. Ah, such is life at the top. 🥂

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2025-05-15 12:48