Crypto Chaos: Trump Tariffs Turn Altcoins into Alt-gone!

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Well, folks, grab your popcorn! 🍿 Donald Trump’s tariff plan is crashing crypto like it’s a bad sitcom! Altcoins are taking a nosedive worse than a clumsy acrobat at a circus! 🎪

Bitcoin, that stubborn little rascal, dipped down to $91.2k—like a sad puppy—but bounced back to $95.5k. Traders are calling this a “dead-cat bounce.” I mean, who knew cats could bounce? 🐱💥

And hold onto your wallets, because we just witnessed a $2.3 billion liquidation! That’s right, folks! Bigger than the COVID crash and the FTX fiasco combined! Talk about a financial rollercoaster! 🎢

Now, experts are scratching their heads, wondering if the crypto bull market is over. Spoiler alert: it’s not looking good! 😬

Trump’s Tariff Tango: A Dance with the Great Depression!

Trump’s tariffs are causing more chaos than a chicken in a room full of rocking chairs! 🐔💃 With 25% tariffs on Canada and Mexico and 10% on China, it’s like he’s trying to start a trade war with the whole world! 🌍

Retaliatory tariffs are flying around like confetti at a New Year’s party, and Bloomberg analysts are saying this could shrink the US GDP growth by 1.2%! Who knew tariffs could be so… *inflationary*? 🎉

Trump’s promise of “pain” being worth the price is a bit like saying, “This will hurt me more than it hurts you!”—except it’s the traders who are feeling the sting! Ouch! 😱

And let’s not forget the Smoot-Hawley tariff plan of 1930! It’s like déjà vu, but with more tariffs and fewer jazz hands! 🎷

Am I the only one who remembers that the Smoot-Hawley tariff was the principal trigger for the 1929 stock market crash and the Great Depression? 🤔

— Bruce Bartlett (@BruceBartlett) February 2, 2025

Is The Crypto Bull Run Over? Or Just Taking a Nap?

After Monday’s crypto crash, the calls for a cycle top are louder than a marching band! 🎺 But smart investors are still keeping their eyes peeled. 👀

Bitcoin is holding onto that $91.2k support like it’s a life raft in a sea of uncertainty! 🛟

Chartered Market Technician Aksel Kibar says BTC’s price action is like a classic movie plot twist—could signal new highs, but only if it doesn’t close below $91.2k! 🎬

If 91.2K holds, we could see a consolidation that’s as thrilling as a rollercoaster ride! 🎢

— Aksel Kibar, CMT (@TechCharts) February 3, 2025

All eyes are on Trump’s meeting with Canada and Mexico! Will he end the tariff wars, or will it be more drama than a soap opera? 📺

Investors looking to buy the dip need to be careful! “Knife catching” is a risky business—like trying to catch a greased pig! 🐖💨

Smart money is pivoting to low-cap investments and presale tokens, because why not? Just yesterday, an early $ELON4AFD investor turned $109 into $350,000! Talk about a glow-up! 💰✨

$109 to over $350,000! Now that’s what I call a trading bot with a sense of humor! 😂

— Kakashi (@kkashi_yt) February 2, 2025

Meanwhile, Wall Street Pepe (WEPE) is raking in nearly a million daily in its presale! It’s like the meme coin that just won’t quit! 🐸💸

Experts are saying WEPE could be the next billion-dollar meme coin! And Solaxy (SOLX) is raising over $17 million in its ICO! It’s like a crypto party, and everyone’s invited! 🎉

With its roll-up architecture, Solaxy is set to tackle SOL’s congestion issues! It’s like the traffic cop of the crypto world! 🚦

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2025-02-03 17:46