Ex-Banker Predicts $1M Bitcoin: Is the Dollar Dead or Just on Vacation? đŸ˜đŸ€‘

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In the twilight of corrupted empires—while rats scurry behind velvet curtains of power—Arthur Hayes, once lord of the digital coin pit, tosses his prediction into the world like a half-smoked cigarette: Bitcoin, that stubborn cyber-orphan, will claw its way to one million dollars by 2028. Not, as the wide-eyed onlookers would have it, because of the almighty Federal Reserve, but rather in spite of it.

“Look beyond the Fed,” he grumbles, as if nursing a hangover from too much economic theory. “The old man in the chair? Just a puppet. Whether he calls himself Powell or Pauli or El Presidente, he’s about as influential as a pigeon at a banquet. The real vodka in the punch bowl comes from the Treasury.”

It’s the Treasury Secretary now playing puppeteer with America’s debts, propping up the old house with buybacks and clever tricks, keeping the dollar’s river flowing. Hayes rolls his eyes at fiscal responsibility: “Americans wouldn’t recognize austerity if it rear-ended their pickup truck.”

He wags a finger over what he calls a performative brawl between the U.S. and China. “A ‘trade deal’? Bah! More like two actors auditioning for the same part—one needs to look tough for an election, and the other needs to look tough for history textbooks. Underneath, they’re trading more assets than compliments at a dinner for thieves.”

Tariffs are for show. Taxes on foreign cash—now we’re talking! “Watch closely while the illusionists work,” Hayes mutters with the grim satisfaction of a man who’s watched too many scams go unpunished. He warns of forced bond swaps and debts stretched so far the digits lose all sense of meaning, because heaven forbid you tell the American stomach to shrink.

As for China? “They say they want out, but math is a jealous lover—they’ll keep buying what America’s selling, eyes wide open, pretending they’re not funding the neighbor’s party.” And what does all this mean for Bitcoin? Simply put, a tide of dollars so reckless it floods every crack, and a digital fortress built to keep dry what’s left of honest value.

And Hayes, always a man who bets with grim humor, keeps most of his wealth tied up in Bitcoin—a chunk in Ethereum, and the rest scattered across what he affectionately calls “quality shitcoins,” as if picking over rotten apples hoping for a sliver of sweetness.

“People want coins that can actually plow a field or at least pretend to,” he sighs, “not just tokens that sparkle in the light and crumble at first touch.” His gospel is clear: Bitcoin won’t hit a million through wild-eyed dreaming, but through the slow, inevitable collapse of a system fat on illusion, where everyone with pockets is grasping for something that won’t wash away in the storm.

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2025-05-09 12:22