SEC Crypto Revolution: Paul Atkins Plans a Regulatory Makeover That Will Shock You

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It seems that Mr. Paul Atkins—the latest orchestrator of the Securities and Exchange Commission’s most delightful symphony of bureaucracy—has flung open the doors to rationality, a word not commonly associated with regulation or, for that matter, with regulators. Fresh from the pulpit of the SEC crypto roundtable, Atkins declared it to be a “new day” for the watchdog, as if the creature had at last dropped its spectacles and discovered the sun. 🌞

SEC’s Great Crypto Makeover: Or, How to Win Friends and Influence Blockchains

Mr. Atkins, clad in the philosophical armor befitting the office, has committed himself to leading the Commission away from its cherished tradition of regulation via wild guesswork and surprise attacks. Instead, one might now expect something akin to clarity. Yes, you heard that right. Clarity from the SEC—how deliciously risqué. The roundtable, shimmering with recent memories of discussions with BlackRock (a name which here means: “the sort of friends you keep when you want to sound very grown-up”), reportedly revolved around the delightful concepts of tokenization and staking.

“It is a new day at the SEC. Policymaking will no longer result from ad hoc enforcement actions.”

At this crypto carnival, Atkins twirled his cane and revealed that he would be prioritizing robust rules for crypto in three exalted domains: issuance (for those who enjoy printing invisible money), custody (for hiding it under virtual mattresses), and trading (for the brave and the bewildered alike). As a gentle avalanche of regulation threatens to descend, the SEC is also pondering tokenization exemptions—because what’s a regulator if not merciful? 🦄

Cryptocurrency Custody and Trading: New Rules, Same Old Drama

With the SEC crypto roundtable in full swing (imagine a tea party, but with more existential dread), Atkins teased a coming wave of regulation. Cryptic asset issuers can look forward to actual rules, to replace what has thus far been more like interpretive dance. He promised that the all-important “qualified custodian” would be addressed with the seriousness usually reserved for who attends the Queen’s garden party.

And for those brooding broker-dealers, Atkins suggested “repealing and replacing” the special purpose broker-dealer framework, because why not add a little razzle-dazzle and call it reform?

As a final flourish, he promised improvements to crypto trading rules. The dream: one omnipotent super app where your securities and non-securities can mingle like confused guests at a masquerade. The ATS regime, Atkins says, is due for a glow-up, and he hints that trading cryptocurrencies on national exchanges may become as ordinary as afternoon gin.

Ripple v. SEC). The long saga may be drawing to a close, though expect one last encore, darling. 🥂

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2025-05-13 00:29