Valour’s Latest Crypto Move: Is Sweden Seriously Buying This?

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Alright, so Valour Inc. — you know, those crypto folks who never sleep — they just popped out two shiny new ETPs on Sweden’s Spotlight Stock Market. Litecoin and Curve DAO. Yeah, because apparently, Swedish investors wake up in the morning and think, “You know what I need? More ETPs. Specifically, Litecoin.” It’s like that IKEA furniture you didn’t ask for, but hey, it’s here now! 🛠️

They’re bragging they’ve got 65+ crypto investment products now, and swear they’ll hit 100 by 2025. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that the world doesn’t have enough investment vehicles. Next thing you know my grandma’s buying Curve DAO with her meatballs.

And get this: you don’t even need a crypto wallet. No private keys, no “seed phrases.” It’s just like buying a regular stock. So easy even my cousin Marty could do it, and he still can’t set up his voicemail. They charge a 1.9% management fee — a small price to pay for not having a stroke over your lost private key, I guess. 😂

Wait, Why Curve and Litecoin?

So Curve DAO… it’s like the duct tape of DeFi, holding the thing together but no one ever really talks about it. It’s got a $940 million market cap, apparently because people love stablecoins. If you’ve touched DeFi, you’ve probably used Curve. Maybe you’re entitled to compensation. But here’s the trick: Curve’s token (CRV) is all about governance and rewards, so you get to pretend you have a say in something. Democracy, but make it crypto. 🗳️

BREAKING: @ValourFunds, a subsidiary of @DeFiTechGlobal, has launched the ‘Valour Litecoin (LTC) SEK ETP’ on Sweden’s Spotlight Stock Market!

— Litecoin Foundation ⚡️ (@LTCFoundation) May 7, 2025

And Litecoin — you know it, I know it, your dentist probably knows it. They call it “Bitcoin’s little sibling,” which is a polite way of saying, “thanks for playing, sport.” It’s been around since 2011, which, in crypto terms, is practically ancient history. Fast, cheap, and apparently still relevant. Nostalgia, but make it decentralized.

Traditional investors get to dip their toes in without going full cryptobro. So your weird uncle can finally brag at Thanksgiving: “I own Litecoin now, Karen, what do you think of that?”

Johanna Belitz at Valour: “Nordic investors want regulation, transparency, and more altcoins. Because nothing says transparency like a decentralized protocol explained only by people yelling on Twitter.”

Sooner or later every portfolio in Finland will look like a Jackson Pollock painting. Is it good? Is it bad? Who knows! But it was expensive.

The Saga Continues

Valour’s not slowing down — more single-asset ETPs are coming. Tron, Stellar, and then some coins nobody’s even heard of yet — Move, Mantra. And you can buy them priced in SEK or EUR. Sweden, Germany, Euronext, Asia, Africa, the Moon — if there’s a stock market Valour isn’t looking at, tell me, I want to visit.

Now they’re even bundling coins together into baskets. Themed baskets! Like Real-World Asset Baskets, Digital Gold Baskets… I swear, the only basket missing is the one to put my anxiety in. Diversification is the name of the game, because God forbid anyone picks just one thing and sticks with it. 😅

And for the daredevils — 2x leveraged ETPs. Because if regular crypto didn’t make you lose sleep, let’s double it! Nothing says “smart investing” like adding gasoline to the fire.

Head of Products, Elaine Buehler, says their team “pairs investor demand with strong fundamentals.” I mean, sure. But I also demand a sandwich made out of gold bars, doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. 🥪

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2025-05-08 08:43