Who Needs the Moon When You Can Rocket to $1 Trillion? Coinbase May Find Out

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If there’s one thing that makes Americans’ hearts beat faster than cheese fries, it’s a trillion-dollar company. Enter Matt Hougan, the ever-ebullient Chief Investment Officer at Bitwise Asset Management—a man who woke up one morning, looked at Coinbase (yes, the crypto exchange), and declared, with the breezy optimism of someone who’s never misread a train timetable, “This is an insanely great acquisition. Coinbase is going to be a $1 trillion company someday.” 🚀

His confidence comes on the heels of Coinbase gobbling up Deribit, the reigning sultan of bitcoin and ethereum options exchanges, for the tidy sum of $2.9 billion—because what better way to announce you’re serious about crypto than by pulling out your wallet and saying, “I’ll take the lot”?

To put this in perspective: as of May 8, 2025, Coinbase is sitting pretty at around $50 billion in market capitalization. That means Hougan is effectively suggesting a twentyfold leap, a bit like looking at your family sedan and announcing it’ll soon win the Monaco Grand Prix. Or that your cat will one day learn to talk and recite Shakespeare. Sure, why not?

Still, the sentiment isn’t just Hougan’s midday caffeine talking. Many market enthusiasts now gaze upon crypto derivatives as the golden escalator to global financial glory—which is finance-speak for “We don’t want to miss the next gold rush, even if we have no idea where the river is.” A trillion is a big number, frankly—one that usually gets reserved for galaxies, federal budgets, or the number of times you’re told your call is important when you ring customer support. Is Coinbase destined to join this exalted, zero-laden club? Well, if enthusiasm counted for everything, they’d already be there. Stay tuned. 🥇🤑

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2025-05-09 08:00